dream on

from the first time i learned about this british beauty i've loved it. i love the looks, the simplicity, and the heritage(there're auxiliary loves besides the primary ones, like the looks people throw at it and how cool its very name sounds). i've always laughed at my mom's reason for buying the pug; she liked how the front grille looks like a big smiley. but i'm no better because those grilles distinguish it from all the other roadsters of its time and i'm in love with them.

it's called a triumph spitfire(ain't it cool?!!). there were five variants produced but i only like the first two. because only they have the grilles and the semi-boat-tail taillights. i don't even mind the lower power because let's face it, none of them is going to beat any speed records. so what's one or two mph less?

so when i saw one for sale i teleported straight to the dealer. everything i saw there reinforced just how much i like this babe.

it's exquisite. it's the british racing green i envisioned, with black(what else?) interior, a wooden dash, and they're throwing in the targa roof on top of the canvas one. and the best thing is it's on a normal number plate instead of those stupid useless classic plates. i nearly went fucking apeshit. but before that i checked underneath the chassis for rust, wear and tear, which were nonexistent. and then i went fucking apeshit.

and then a thought flittered through my mind: could it have been this if not for the morris? what have i given up?

i can contemplate giving up the silvia for a spitfire, albeit a little reluctantly. having said that, my hatred for this shithole far outweighs my fondness for this thing. so i'll get it in the other land. and if it's more rare than a chimera even there, well then. i can always make do with a silvia. heh. or a couple of Ducatis. woot!

cutting notches

on my way home on the highway, this type-r boy racer in front tried to show me the power of his car. guess he just didn't like the fact that i could keep up with him. but guess what. he was such a joke that i'm just going to call him a her starting... now.

so she made the mistake of going behind a slow car and got stuck there. while i breezed past. and then she tried to keep up with me by throwing some dangerously stupid maneuvers. i kept my speed constant to give her a chance and still she couldn't do it.

now let's see some numbers to get a clearer picture.

honda civic type-r: 225bhp

peugeot 407: 150+bhp when new, and it decreases with age.

so if you haven't got the balls to max it out, do not fucking do it.

and after that she threw some more dangerous maneuvers and finally got in front. but i didn't see the point in catching up, so i watched as she buttstuck to one car after another in a bid to get away from me.  as i made my exit.

arrogance? yes.

but then your fucking jap tuner just got raped by a fucking french luxury saloon and that's a fact, alright? go take up knitting, bitch.

fun in the car

yim: i called you twice this morning. then i gave up and came straight over. you should really employ a secretary to blow you awake every morning.

me: hahahahaha! a fine idea, my friend!

breaked

bonnie checked out as well.

i should never have gone out when she refused to eat the carrots. i should have done something. anything.

i was afraid to touch her. to find out that she'd truly gone stiff.

i understand now why people shed tears when those they hold dear perish.

the combined wave of shock, grief, regret, guilt, and the inability to express anything.

the ultimate futility of even forming coherent thoughts.

i caused this.

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuc kfuc kfuc kfuc kfu kcuf fuckfu ckfu fucjkfucjfucjfu cjfu cjfuc j fuckfuc kfu ck fuck fuCK FUCK FU CFIU FKFUCKF CUFK UCKFUCK UFKC CU FKCFUCKUFCKaiDA YT 3965B UY6'0-3 6B9Q5 ,9

changing hearts

i got dad into the idea of buying a classic car for a rental business and to potter around in. it's a morris minor. and what would tristan and renne do but disagree.

but then one afternoon trist texted me.

----------

he: i think the beetle is a good idea. and i wanna drive it once when u get it!
me: are u drunk?
he: i'm being supportive u idiot!
he: a little bit drunk too la.
me: in the bloody afternoon. that's a new one.

----------

and it's a morris, not a bloody beetle.

^^^^^^^^^^

recently drove bekev's car again. it holds like a magnet and handles like a virgin. if you want to be really anal it's slightly less torquey than the mini. but i'm willing to overlook that in light of the manual stick.

the impossible

this thing was built to destroy ferraris and lambos. i don't know if it did but... wow can.

{^__________^}

yim: i'd fucking import this thing.

me: i fucking agree.

yim: lol! imagine driving in town with people wondering whether it's a real bmw or some poser!

me: snort! those dumbtards wouldn't even be fit to blow me.

{^__________^}

and he agreed.

 and yes, one variant has the m engine too.

are such cars unattainable because they're exquisite, or exquisite because they're unattainable?

pwned

is when you share a pic like

with a girl on msn.

when she's using a laptop.

in her living room.

with her mom behind her.

feeling lomo

yes the stars were beautiful, as always.

the problem is they're not consistently so.

lightroom

behold the magnificence of the new photo editing program.

love the effects.

but i spent forty-five minutes wondering how to stamp watermarks before giving up.

and thirty-five minutes wondering how i watermarked my old pics on photoshop.

and another ten seconds to decide i don't fucking need one.

outside

and you bring me to my knees

again

all the times that i could beg you please

in vain

all the times that i felt insecure

for you

and i leave my burdens at the door

i'm on the outside

i'm looking in

i can see through you

see your true colours

'cause inside you're ugly

ugly like me

i can see through you

see to the real you

all the times that i felt like this won't end

it's for you

and i taste what i could never have

it was from you

all the times that i've cried my intentions

full of pride

but i waste more time than anyone

i'm on the outside

i'm looking in

i can see through you

see your true colours

'cause inside you're ugly

ugly like me

i can see through you

see to the real you

all the times that i've cried

all this wasting

it's all inside

and i feel all this pain

stuffed it down

it's back again

and i lie here in bed

all alone

i can't mend

but i feel

tomorrow will be okay

i'm on the outside

i'm looking in

i can see through you

see your true colours

inside you're ugly

ugly like me

i can see through you

see to the real you

it's been a while

it's been a while

since i could hold my head up high

and it's been a while

since i first saw you

it's been a while

since i can stand on my own two feet again

and it's been a while

since i could call you

and everything i can't remember

as fucked as it all may seem

the consequences that i've rendered

i've stretched myself beyond my means

and it's been a while

since i could say that i wasn't addicted

and it's been a while

since i can say i love myself as well

and it's been a while

since i've gone and fucked things up just like i always do

and it's been a while

but all that shit seems to disappear when i'm with you

and everything i can't remember

as fucked up as it all may seem

the consequences that i've rendered

i've gone and fucked things up again

why must i feel this way

just make this go away

just one more peaceful day

it's been a while

since i could look at myself straight

and it's been a while

since i said i'm sorry

it's been awhile

since i've seen the way the candles light your face

and it's been a while

but i can still remember just the way you taste

and everything i can't remember

as fucked up as it all may seem to me

i know it's me, i cannot blame this on my father

he did the best he could for me

it's been a while

since i could hold my head up high

it's been a while

since i said i'm sorry

fun in the exam hall

----------

why must 10-mark questions only be answered in three pages or more?

isn't it more about understanding than regurgitating the notes?

---

i don't suppose you could cut me some slack?

---

really?

---

oh well. goodbye cruel world.

---

lol!

----------

written in my answer booklet.

i'm not proud of it. i just couldn't care less.

beyond redemption

that place near s-dam where i went with yim to take some nature shots?

we went there again today and saw how it's been changed. the trees lining the road were nowhere to be found. and they weren't even in the way of anything.

rage took me.

at whoever did it?

or at those who don't care?

i really couldn't decide, and i realised i really shouldn't bother.
i'm not a druid but i don't piss my resources away either.

i'm reminded of this show called the age of stupid. enough said.

it's feeding my resolve to relocate as soon as humanly possible. because this place is not just a sinking ship. it's already doomed.

people who know me well would know where i want to go.

because they at least know how to build roads around mountains and valleys without levelling every single fucking thing in sight.

and their idea of heritage preservation does not include.
leasing.
them.
out.
to.
american.
sailors.

i'll take my chances with crime and racism.

models maybe

i'm thinking about shooting models. by which i mean friends, not those bimbos who charge money for standing and posing.

yeah yeah i'm studying as well.

whoa. nothing like giving yourself a guilt trip.

korea

hello korea.

day 0

^^^^^

plane ride.

day 1

^^^^^

arrival, street shots, dae jang guem's place, plane to jeju.

commie housing. just like singasomewhere

more commie housing

喜煙室.

because it resembles the word and when i saw it i felt maximum 喜.

day 2

^^^^^

mountain climbing, saw a huge cock, bear museum.

huge cock

impostor in the ranks

day 3

^^^^^

plane back to mainland, everland resort.

THANKS!!!

day 4

^^^^^

mountain climbing.

day 5

^^^^^

ski resort, lotte world.

in korea only diplomats and ganglords can afford a european, so when i saw this m3 i was like, oooh, excites!

and then our tour bus overtook it a minute later.

isn't it funny how when certain singular words come together they mean something else?

day 6

^^^^^

palace, president's residence, shopping.

more funny word games.

day 7

^^^^^

the tour group was deported but we were allowed to stay back to do some shooting/shopping and contribute to their gdp.

free gifts from shopping. draw your own conclusions.

day 8

^^^^^

more shopping and shooting, n tower.

i became collateral last night. somebody was happy. somebody.

day 9

^^^^^

some shooting, then back home.

goodbye korea.

of course shitloads of other events happened too. just because i don't mention food doesn't mean we didn't eat.